In The Moment. Or Not.

Things have been really, really busy in my life. Hence, the lack of activity on this site. And on top of that, I’ve been beset by problems in my training. Both physical and technical. And mental.

Physical: My calf is still causing me problems. I’m doing an 8-week session with a local college, where there are a group of eager Senior Physical Therapy students who are working with me to increase my core strength and flexibility. They’ve got me on a series of stretches and exercises that are helping me out. But still, my calf acts up.

This past Friday, at the PT session, I did my first running in three-plus weeks. I stretched, and the students stretched me as well. But even with that, I only managed about 650 meters before my calf twinged again. Frack. So, more RICE and stretches for that, and another week of no real running. It’s frustrating, because the rest of my body feels ready to do this, and I’ve got to wait for one measly strip of muscle to get myself on the road.

Technical: My swimming leg has some issues. The ‘active ankle’ feature is supposed to allow me to quickly switch the foot from a ‘walking’ position to a ‘swimming’ position, which will allow me to actually start propelling myself along with my kicks.  While it goes into the swimming position relatively quickly when I get in the water, it seems to get sticky after it’s been used for a while.

Having a swimming leg that doesn’t work well when it gets wet is sort of problematic. Plus, when it does go back to the walking position, it tends to unlock itself as I walk. My prosthetist has talked to the manufacturer who wants us to send it back. I don’t yet want to do that. I’ve done some workarounds for the situation, such as bringing my regular leg to the edge of the pool while I swim. That way, if there’s a problem, I can just swap my leg there. While everyone is watching me.

Yes, that’s  uncomfortable for me to do. I feel very self-conscious when I do stuff like that. But it beats not doing the work.

Wow. Did I really just write that?

Mental: I’m just now getting an idea of just how much work this is going to take. While the amount of work doesn’t really scare me (see above graf again), the amount of time it will take to do the work is a bit daunting. I usually work 50-55 hours a week between my regular job and my freelance gigs. And right now, I need the freelance work. I dropped a lot of it last year to concentrate on riding, and my finances really took a hit. I would love to get a better-paying job, but that would mean I would need to know what I want to do instead of the job I have.

Actually, I do know what I want to do. It’s going to take some work and some luck to get to a point where I could do it for a living. And that work is going to take some time.

And then there’s the issue of my kids. I want to spend time with them I need to spend time with them. They are the most fun thing I’ve ever done in my life. I don’t want to end up taking all the time I spend with them away.

So far, I’ve been able to avoid that. I get up at 5 and exercise then. Or I do it during lunch. Some days–like today–I do both.  Some evenings I also do some workouts, but not every night. But there’s going to be a time in the not-too-distant future where I’m going to need to spend more time on the road or in the water, and less time with them.

I’m not looking forward to that.

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