February 20, 2011

Six months until the hill climb. Exactly sixth months.

I’ve registered. I’ve paid my money. I’m in. Six months from today I will be riding a bicycle up a very steep mountain for a very long time. Six months from when I’m actually writing this, I’ll know if I have succeeded or failed in this quest.

Oh, God. What have I done?

Actually, I only feel that way part of the time. The part where I’m awake. (rimshot) Thank you! Tip your waiter!

No, really. There are times where I’m panic-stricken and completely afraid of doing this–or, more accurately, attempting this and failing. Failing horribly. Dropping out after a mile, or some such thing. Coming home completely shamed. Stuff like that.

And there are other times, where I’m not at all afraid of this quest. Where I know that, although it’s going to be incredibly difficult, it’s still something I can do, or at least attempt to do. And even if I fail to reach the summit, it will be a learning experience and I will be a better man for attempting it.

Right now, these two mental states are running fifty-fifty in my brain. So, I’m going to do whatever I can to skew my mental state towards the latter. Because I believe that my attitude is at least as important as my physical state. And one of the best ways I know to get past these feelings of negativity and failure is to expose them to the light of day. Which means you may be getting more than one posts about fear in the next six months.

So that’s that. Let’s move forward.

Okay, one last bit of old business: Where the hell have I been?

Around. You know how it is. I don’t post for a day, and then the next day’s just as busy, and then suddenly a week’s gone by and then a month and I think “well, there’s really not much to report other than ‘I went into the basement and pedaled'” so I don’t bother to report anything at all. Plus, when I last posted anything, I had said that I was going to have pictures taken for promotional use, and that got delayed in a way that would probably make an interesting post sometime. So there were lots of very good, extremely legitimate reasons for me to not report for the last four months.

I believe the technical term for that last paragraph is: bullshit.

Let’s get one thing straight: The main reason I’m writing this is not because I’m all that interesting. I’m writing this to hold myself accountable. I know me. I need to live my life in the open if I’m to have any sort of life at all. If I set a goal for myself, and keep it to myself, I will have no incentive to keep working towards that goal. My failure will be private, and inevitable.*

So I blog. I take the time to post. To tell you what’s going on. Because I know that I’m only as sick as my secrets.

Six months to go. Exactly six months. I get to choose how I feel about this. Right now I’m feeling pretty happy.

One more thing: Here’s some pictures of me:

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Okay, one more one more thing: If you’re interested in helping my cause, you can donate in my name here.


*It’s for that reason that you’ve never seen my Emmy-award-winning sitcom, nor have you read about my deliriously happy life with Jennifer Aniston.